Reflections on 2020

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It’s finally here: the end of 2020.

Insert a collective sigh of relief: We made it. 

2020 is a year that will probably live in infamy in our minds, what with civil unrest, contentious politics, and a pandemic that has negatively impacted finances, overwhelmed hospital systems, and devastated families, either through loss of life, loss of income, or loss of health (such as for COVID “long-haulers").

It can be kind of hard to feel positive through all that.

This year challenged my mental and emotional state, admittedly. I've had to dig deep many times. I usually take stock of the past year and talk about good stuff and challenges, what I was grateful for and what I learned, but I’ve been sitting here for the last few days, aware that I wanted to make an end-of-year post but not really sure what to say about it. 

I think I'm just kind of "done" with this year, you know? 

So for me, when I take stock of this past year, it’s not about finding the bright spots. It’s not about being positive. Or grateful. I do all those things most days, anyway, but I think for a particularly difficult year such as this one:

It’s important to acknowledge we survived it. 

We may not have thrived. 

We may have felt lonely or depressed or upset or disempowered. 

We might have worried, stressed out, and felt anxious. 

We might have felt like we were riding one of those mechanical bull rides at a bar, getting thrown repeatedly.

But if you're here reading this, then you might be able to relate to the idea that while we may have taken some hard knocks this year...

...we survived.

And right here in this moment, that’s enough for me. 

So if you're just not in the most positive mindset right now for whatever reason...

It’s okay.

Give yourself some care and comfort. It’s been a really wild ride. Acknowledge that we’ve been through some shit. Know that things WILL get better eventually.

I won’t villainize 2020...

...But what I WILL do is close the book on 2020 and look forward to the new year, whatever it will bring. I will clean-slate it, not judging 2021 on what 2020 did to us.

So, if (like me) you’re spending New Year’s Eve in your jammies hanging out on the couch doing not much at all, that’s okay. If (like me) you’re hoping and praying fervently for a better year next year, that’s okay. Or if, on the other hand, you’re whooping it up and popping champagne at midnight … that’s also okay. 

Whatever it is you're doing to transition to a new year...it’s all okay. 

Do what you need to do to acknowledge you survived as long as you do it safely and with kindness and compassion, both for yourself and for others. Let's move forward now...

My hope for you all is a bright and blessed New Year. May good things come to all of you: happiness, love, health, kindness, compassion, and everything you need in life.

Much love from me to you!

* * * * 

If you need any help at all with coping this season or at any time, many places have service on a sliding scale, through insurance programs, or offer financial aid. Here are a few resources that may help if you need that extra support*: 

National Suicide Prevention Hotline  800-273-8255

Better Help (text-based mental health care)

7 Best Mental Health Apps

Teledoc

Lemonaid

...or check with your local network / insurance provider.

*Not personal recommendations; simply a list to get you started if you need help finding resources.

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Guest Blog Post at Skinner Self-Publishing Services (Self-Care Tips You Can Sink Your Teeth Into)

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links, by which I may be financially compensated. See Disclosures for more info. 


Happy Halloween!! It's my favorite holiday again, and although this year's festivities will be different than other years, I still managed to get up to something fun to celebrate. 

As you may know, I'm an editor and writer, and one of my fellow colleagues, Jody Skinner at Skinner Self-Publishing Services, reached out to me and several others in our field and asked if we'd like to participate in a self-care tips blog post for her website. 

And with it being Halloween ... we all wrote as if we were vampires! I promise these are tips you can really sink your teeth into! (Thanks to a fellow colleague for that quip, LOL) 🧛🤣

So in lieu of a post here this month, I encourage you to go check out the guest post at Jody's site. It's valuable information, and while it's titled as being for writers, ANYONE can benefit from the suggestions there!  

Take care, and have a safe Halloween! Toodle-oo!

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

My 2020 Resolution: Going Within and Listening

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links, by which I may be financially compensated. See Disclosures for more info. 


Greetings, all, and Happy Holidays! I hope you have been having a wonderful holiday season. 

Photo by Monika Grabkowska on Unsplash

We have had a nice set of holidays here at Chez Bee. Both Thanksgiving and Christmas were simple and lovely. My husband and I took time to cook together (though he treated me by doing most of the cooking on Christmas day; I was sous chef), and I've been rediscovering how much I enjoy baking. 

Since we downsized into this smaller house many years ago, I really haven't been doing that much baking due to our small and, frankly, terrible oven. We have one of those apartment-sized stoves (it came with the place), and we haven't replaced it yet. It doesn't bake evenly, and it doesn't have a light, and I'd just kind of lost my enthusiasm for baking. 

But then I discovered just how good my toaster oven is. Indeed, the manual gives instructions for baking several mainstay items, so I ordered bakeware made for a toaster oven and have been having a wonderful time rediscovering this hobby. I've even branched out to make things I've never made before. On today's agenda: these traditional Hungarian cookies. It feels good to get back into it!

Anyway, those are the life updates, but there's one more thing I want to raise as we go into 2020.

Being on the cusp of a new year, it's typical to make resolutions, such as to lose weight, get a new job, buy a house, etc.

If you've been reading for any length of time, you know that I am a very goal-oriented person, myself. We've talked about how to reach our goals here on positively b.e.e. quite a few times, and usually, the topic is more of a how-to nature, whether it's making action plans or writing mission statements or signing up for classes or changing mindset or what have you.

But this year I am going to take another tack when reaching for goals. 

This year, my resolution is to get to know myself better by going within rather than using external factors. This may sound a little odd, but bear with me.

I've noticed I'm craving more silence. I'm not on social media as much. I'm reading more in my spare time. Sometimes I work on my hand crafts and don't have anything to accompany that task: no TV; no music; no audiobook—nothing.

This has been a bit of an eye-opener. How?

At first, the silence was nearly deafening. I noticed the noise in my head and all the things I tell myself.

Rather than tamp it down, I just let that play out for a bit so I could learn from it.

After learning from my internal speech, I then focused on my breathing and allowed pure intention to take the place of the noise.

This was so enlightening! The level of focus I have had these last few weeks has been amazing!

Anyway, the point of me sharing all of this is to encourage you to try the silent approach if you like when you set your resolutions this year. Turn off the TV, radio, music, whatever. Get off of social media and your news feed.

Do something you enjoy in total silence.

• Listen to the noise—what are you telling yourself? How can you learn from it?
• Are you willing to let it go? Is it even yours?
• B R E A T H E
• Think about an intention that you can replace the internal monologue with
• Keep breathing and focus that intent
• How does that make you feel? What is the outcome?

Grab your journal and write any insights down! For me, a major insight was that half of the stuff replaying in my head wasn't even mine! It was my mind turning over things I'd read, things that upset me from the news or internet arguments, or thinking about scenes from movies or shows I'd watched, and then some of it was my own insecurities or worries. Once I was able to identify all of that, I was able to deal with it and focus.

I'll be curious to hear what your resolutions are and what approaches work for you. Maybe this approach doesn't work for you, but something else does. Drop me a line in the comments below and share what works, what doesn't, and what the outcome is!

In the meantime, I'd like to wish you all a wonderful winter, a Happy New Year, and the all the joy of discovery that awaits. 

Here's to an amazing 2020! 

💛🐝

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Happy Halloween!

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Hello everyone! I can't believe October is just about over! 

Things have been really hopping over here at Chez Bee.  I finished my course, and then started another. Workflow has been steady, and I joined a gym! 

So now it's Halloween, and my biggest challenge today is not to eat all the candy before the kiddos show up tonight in all their Halloween finery. 

If you know me at all, you know that Halloween is my FAVORITE holiday! 🎃👻🕷

Why?

Well... 

Young Bee as Princess Leia

Costumes are fun! My mom made my costumes when I was a kid, and there were some great ones! I still love getting into a costume for Halloween if I have an event to go to. At the very least, I don a witch's hat and cloak and pet my talking raven when I answer the door to trick-or-treaters, and this year I'm wearing fuzzy, sparkly ghost socks. I really enjoy seeing the creativity and imagination of kids who dress up. They're just so cute!

I may be about to express an unpopular opinion here, but I don't mind older kids trick-or-treating. They grow up so fast and this world can be so hard; if they want to hold on to this one piece of their childhood for another year or two, I have no beef with that, and there is plenty of candy to go around.

And I guess my second potentially unpopular opinion is that I love candy corn!

And then there are all the decorations! I love seeing what people do to their yards, porches, and doors during the Halloween season. Some people give a nod with fake cobwebs and spiders or a skeleton hanging around. Many carve jack o'lanterns. And then some go all out, turning their entire property into a haunted attraction! I've been seeing some posts on Nextdoor about local "haunted" houses, and I make sure I drive around to see them.

Fred and I often do our porch up with a whole Halloween tableau, but with my schedule and the weather this year, we're only going to have a few lights up and a small pumpkin-and-ravens display if I can get it together by the time trick-or-treat starts.

I loved this pumpkin costume!

Also, there's something about autumn air that invigorates me. It is crisp and cool, and there's a crunch of leaves underfoot, amplified by dozens of little feet as they make their way around the neighborhood. Though this year it looks like we're going to get rain. You win some, you lose some!

I'm a huge fan of monster movies, too, and this time of year, they're readily available. I primarily love the classics, like Lon Chaney's The Wolf Man, or Bela Lugosi's time-honored Dracula. The House on Haunted Hill is creepy (Vincent Price was amazing!) as is The Fog, and of course, who doesn't like a good Swamp Thing film on a Saturday afternoon? And I make sure to watch Something Wicked This Way Comes at least once a year! I've been in my element because one of the local movie channels has been airing nonstop monster movies all week!

So anyway, those are some of my thoughts on Halloween and why it's a cool holiday! I think it's important to have some fun and enjoy all of the spooky delights this time of year. As you encounter trick-or-treaters, try to see things through their eyes. I bet you smile! 

What are some of your favorite Halloween traditions or memories? Drop me a comment and share! 

In the meantime, I made you a Halloween playlist  for today and tonight. Enjoy!

Have fun, and be safe!

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Taking Stock

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How was your 2018? 

Even if it wasn't that hot, what good can you take away from it? 

As we get ready to close out one year and welcome the next, it's common to take stock of where we are now and where we are going. 

For me, it's been an incredible year: one full of hardships and success; sadness and joy; change and stillness; fear and peacefulness. 

Because that's how life is, right? It's a series of events, emotions, and states of being that are either good, bad, or neutral, and we often perceive things as "happening to" us. People also tend to take one or two bad things happening as a sign of how things will go. How many times have I seen on social media that "This year is fired!" before it's really even gotten under way? 

I challenge you not to do that to yourself this year.

The only thing that is guaranteed in 2019 is that both good and bad will happen, because that's life—but what you make of it is up to you. 2019 will also hold possibility, potential, opportunity, growth, and hope. Which way are you going to see things?

My hope for you as we enter 2019 is that you will consider what I wrote a couple of weeks ago and thank 2018, in some way, for contributing to who you are today. I also hope that you will greet 2019 with open eyes and open hearts to the possibilities that abound.

Photo by Oskars Sylwan on Unsplash

May your 2019 be filled with peace, hope, love, joy, and gratitude! 💛🐝

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Fortune Cookie Friday: A Happy Event

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Well, here we are: the last Fortune Cookie Friday of 2018! Can you believe it? Where has this year gone?

This week's fortune was sent in by a reader, and it seems appropriate to the time of year:

A happy event will take place in your home.

I know not everyone celebrates Christmas, but the world does seem to take a break around the last two weeks of December. This seems like a good time of year to make plans. Hint: "plans" don't have to be formal, either!

So, with that in mind, I hope that you will take some time to have a happy event at some point over the next few weeks, and here are some ideas if you'd like! Set up a holiday hot chocolate bar and invite friends over for movies (have that endless debate about Die Hard while you're at it). You could host a New Year's party, or, if that's not your style, have a game night. Design a winter-themed brunch, or go on a post-Christmas discounted shopping spree. If you're feeling like hiding out for some well-deserved R&R, how about making some mimosas and waffles and binge-watching Netflix in your jimmy-jams? (This one sounds about my speed, LOL.)

Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash

My point is, anything you can think of that will soothe your soul and make you happy qualify as "happy events," to me. Take some time for yourself, decide to do something fun, and put your own spin on it. :)

So as you have these happy events these next few weeks, why don't you share them here? I feel like when people share the good stuff going on in their lives with each other, it's easy for the happiness to multiply. I'll share mine, below.

And since it is the Friday before Christmas: if you celebrate Christmas or the holiday season in any way, then from my family to yours, may you have a warm and wonderful holiday and many happy events to come! 💛🐝

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Thankful...

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Hello everyone! I can't believe it is already mid-November. I hope your autumn has been going well. 

Photo by Pro Church Media on Unsplash

If you live in the USA, then you know what next week is: THANKSGIVING! 🦃🍂🍁

For those of you not from the US (though some other countries do have similar holidays), Thanksgiving is a holiday that garners a lot of attention, both positive and negative, and for a lot of reasons that I won't break down, here. The basic idea behind the day, though, is to spend time with family, celebrate with a huge feast, and give thanks for what we have. 

You all know by now that we here at positively b.e.e. believe in being thankful EVERY day, but still, it seems appropriate to make the post prior to Thanksgiving one about thankfulness. Here are some things I am thankful for, lately:

• My editing and writing consulting work. It makes me so happy to help people with their writing, whether academic, fiction, business, or nonfiction.
• My wonderful family, especially my parents and husband. I seriously won the people lottery with these folks in my life.
• The fantastic birthday I just had. I got so many nice wishes, they really made my week!
• My tribe, both IRL and virtual. I love meeting with like minds and souls who really get the work I want to do in the world. I am so blessed to have such a supportive and loving extensive network of friends and colleagues.
• Speaking of...this brings me to all of you. Yep, you're on the list! You are a part of my tribe, and I am truly thankful for you, too. Writing positively b.e.e. and hearing how it makes a difference in your lives completes a beautiful cycle of trust, love, and gratitude, every single week.

LEAVE ME A COMMENT or drop me a line and let me know: What are you thankful for lately? Let's create a gratitude movement!

Let me wrap this up by sharing this song with you that I heard recently: Kelly Clarkson's "Thankful." Enjoy! And if you're in the USA, have a wonderful holiday next week! 💛🐝

 ~positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there!~

Happy Easter and Happy Spring!

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Today is Easter Sunday, and if you celebrate, then Happy Easter! If you don't, then Happy Spring! 🌷🌸

Photo by Sweet Amaryllis on Unsplash

Maybe it's just that the weather is getting warmer, but this time of year tends to symbolize renewal and hope for me. I went for a walk outside yesterday and relished the feel of sunshine on my face, smiled at some families flying kites in the park, and watched some folks play soccer. Before that, I took a moment over my morning coffee to watch the birds doing cute little bird things. They seemed happy to be out and about in my yard, chirping away!

So at least Spring is finally getting around to showing up (ok, ok, I know some of us are supposed to get snow), but really, winter is just about over and it's time for outdoor things!

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

Drop me a line and let me know what you plan to do either for the holiday or just in general with the return of warmer weather. And have a wonderful day!  🐝

 ~~ positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest. Follow me there! ~~

Happy New Year!

As 2018 begins, so many people are looking forward to a new year full of promise. We are all eager to have hopes and dreams fulfilled!

For myself, closing out 2017 was the end of an interesting year, in many ways. Like any other year, there have been pains and illnesses, but also many, many joys and blessings. I finished the year by writing in the final pages of my last gratitude journal, and am starting my new journal today.

My wish for all of you is that 2018 is ABUNDANT in blessings, joy, interesting stories, and love. May all of YOUR dreams be fulfilled!

What will you write about this year?

Comment below if you'd like to share any resolutions or goals you are setting for 2018!




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There's magic in the air

Can you feel it?

That anticipation?

There's magic in the air!

By now, Santa is making his rounds, presents are happening, and kids are trying to catch him coming down the chimney by leaving out cookies and milk.

I don't know about you guys, but I'm like a little kid right now. There's just something about Christmas that makes me feel young again.

I'm with family enjoying the magic of the holidays, and for those that celebrate, I hope you are having a wonderful holiday, too!

positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest! Follow me there!

Self-Care During the Holidays

Remember to take care of yourself during the holiday season, or else you'll end up with "Frankenstein Coffee". Or worse, NO coffee!

You probably think I'm nuts, but read ahead. Imagine the following:

There I was, in PJs and slippers, hair askew, slowly shuffling into the kitchen while resembling the walking dead. One eye was half-open, the other one was closed, and I barely avoided knocking into things.

I managed to fill and start the kettle.

I managed to pull out the pour-over pot and the filter.

The water started boiling! Yay! Hope is nigh: soon, I will be caffeinated! I can do this! I am ready to tackle this Sunday!

*pulls out ground coffee*

Uh-oh.

I've only got a tiny bit of regular coffee left...

*roots around in cabinet*

...and also some weird vanilla stuff from Target that I didn't really like the first time I tried it.

Ok! I've got this! I'll just combine them. I'll finish up the regular stuff, and a scoop or 2 of vanilla on top will eke out a large mug. Should be drinkable, right? Whatever, caffeine is caffeine.

*coffee brews*

*pours coffee in mug*

Almost there!

*opens fridge*

Uh-oh.

I've only got a trickle of milk left, no half-n-half, and a smattering of what might be expired pumpkin spice Mini Moo's® rattling around in the drawer of the fridge. I honestly have no idea of their freshness status, because the box was chucked out long ago during an effort to neaten up the fridge.

I very sleepily attempt to give myself a pep talk: "Ok, Beth, this MAY be an emergency, but you CAN deal. How bad can half-vanilla coffee with potentially expired pumpkin spice creamer be? At least you have enough for a mug. Suck it up, suck it down, and get on with things."

Today, this is what "adulting" looks like in positively b.e.e. land.

Guys: If you know me AT ALL, you know that while I am an early riser, I am not exactly a "morning person." I literally stumble around with one eye half-open so I don't crash into anything, but that's it. Bare-minimum engagement with the world around me until I wake up is my modus operandi. I am nonverbal, nonvisual, and nonfunctioning. I do not even contemplate using actual words until I've been up for awhile and have started sipping the blessed, blessed bean.

If you're a guest in my house and you witness this, you get used to it. You know not to ask me anything complicated or try to have a conversation while I'm still waking up. If you need to know where something is, I can point at the thing you need, but don't expect much else. I may answer you with grunts and shrugs until my language centers come fully online.

Now, I'm usually pretty good at taking care of myself. I know what I need to do to get through any day, let alone the last weekend before Christmas. Taking care of myself usually starts with a cup of coffee. And yet (!!!), I had somehow, in the midst of all the holiday craziness, broken my CARDINAL RULE:

Always have coffee supplies in the house. Coffee. Half-n-half or milk. Sugar. These are the basics, right? It could be the apocalypse outside, but I will be fully caffeinated before handling all the zombies, is all I'm saying.

What happened that I have let such a travesty befall my house?

I had been so busy shopping for Christmas presents, prepping for Christmas visits, writing Christmas cards, doing this, doing that, doing the other thing--that I had completely forgotten to take care of my own needs.

Thankfully, my needs this season basically amount to shopping for more coffee supplies. And I am immensely grateful that that's all I need!

Hopefully, this was a humorous reminder to practice self-care over the holidays. Don't lose sight of what YOU need this season, ok?

Take a little time for yourself, sip some coffee (or wine), and take a breather. Things don't need to be perfect. Whether you celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Yule, or nothing at all, this time of year has a way of getting us in a tizzy. The important things are family, shared traditions, and spending time with each other, NOT all the other stuff that gets us wound up, like shopping, parties, cooking, baking, etc. Those things are certainly fun, but sometimes they have a way of making us a little nuts, too.

Also, if you love the holidays, they go by so fast, don't they? Blink and you miss it! Try to slow down and take it all in.

For instance, sometimes after work, instead of driving straight home, I'll go the long way around and drive through extended portions of the neighborhood to look at everyone's lights while singing along to Christmas carols playing on my car stereo. It's a small thing, but it's a few minutes of "me time" that I cherish, and ensures I'm living in the moment without the holiday to-do list pressing in on me.

Comment below and let me know how you like to celebrate the season, what you're doing to get through it, or even what type of coffee you like!  Don't forget to share with your friends!

And whatever you celebrate, I hope you have a wonderful rest of the year!

Oh, and while I may have just sucked it up and sucked it down, my Frankenstein coffee actually wasn't too bad, after all! Who knew?

positively b.e.e. is on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest! Follow me there!

Thankfulness: Not Just One Day A Year

Today is Thanksgiving Day in the States, a national holiday.

Many (but not all) Americans will have the day off of work. The reason for the day is ostensibly to "Be Thankful." Realistically, though, people are going to eat a lot of turkey, stuffing, and pie; watch some football or a parade; and maybe have a nap or play some card or board games. Some of the hard core Christmas shoppers will start shopping the "Black Friday" sales early that evening (made possible by people who take time away from their families so that people can shop). 

Thanksgiving Day gives me time with my own family, so I like it. We get to enjoy each other's company, eat some good food, take a walk in the beautiful park near my house, watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and the National Dog Show, and get that nap in.

At any rate, regardless of what day it is, I tend to be thankful all year round, not just one day a year when we're "supposed" to be. So without further adieu, let's sum up some small portion of that:

my latest gratitude journal

~ I am thankful for my husband and family, our home and cars, our jobs and health, and our ability to pursue our hobbies. 

~ I am thankful for the multitude of amazing friends I have made over the years, and the wonders of social media and modern communication that allow us to be in touch so easily. Not only does social medial enable us to stay in touch, it's how I met so many of the people I cherish as friends.

~ I am thankful that I am about to finish filling up YET ANOTHER gratitude journal. I am also grateful that I was gifted with several beautiful blank journals to be filled (one of which is shown here). 

This isn't all I'm thankful for, but it's a good start. Gratitude is an important part of my happiness formula, and keeping these journals has done a lot to turn my worldview around from a negative one to a positive one. 

I tend to write either in the morning, especially if I'm in a negative mood, because it starts the day off right and helps me re-train my brain; or in the evening, as a way of wrapping up the day and reflecting quietly on something that went well. 

Keeping this journal has helped me remember what's going well in life when times are dark.  Entries don't need to be long, wordy, or complicated, either. Sometimes a powerful observation can be made in only a few sentences! 

Finally, journals aren't just for writing in; you can read them, too! I love reading my old entries! They are such a pick-me-up.

So...wherever you are, whether it's Thanksgiving Day or not, and whether you celebrate Thanksgiving or not, feel free to comment below: what are you grateful for? Do you keep a gratitude journal? And if not, what's your favorite way of acknowledging the good things in life?

Oh, I might add one final point: I'm grateful for all of you. Thank you for following me here! 

Happy Thanksgiving!  

==
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